I’ve been thinking a lot lately about all of the different kinds of love we experience on a daily basis. I mean, I love my mom so much, no matter how much she pushes my buttons. I love my dog when she curls up in my lap for a nap. Even still, I loooove the way bacon smells when it’s popping in the pan. These can’t possibly be the same kinds of love, right?
When I really start to think about it, I realize that I love a lot of things (and people) in a lot of different ways. My favorite poet is Marisa de los Santos and my favorite of her poems is one in which she describes loving a stranger. I apologize for not being able to find the poem right now, but the gist of it is this: She driving in a traffic jam on a super hot day. People are bumper to bumper and it’s so hot you can see the heat waves between cars. The guy in front of her stops driving inch-by-inch and a huge gap starts to open between him and the car in front of him. She is about to lay on her horn when she notices that he is staring, transfixed by something to their left. She looks over and sees the humongous and gorgeous moon rising up slowly. It takes her breath away and she suddenly realizes that she loves this stranger in a way that she could never love even her own husband. Of course, she describes it much more beautifully and poetically than I am…
I love this poem though because it describes this wonderfully intimate moment that this man is having with nature amidst the chaos and torture of a traffic jam. And the author, upon catching him in this secret moment of appreciation, can’t help but love him for it. I guess this is how I feel about many people: I can’t help but love them for just being who they are.
In my own life, I have this same sort of revelation on an almost daily basis. I love the mail guy because he knows every zip code in the county by heart. I love the bookstore lady because she can’t help but gush about her favorite novels. I love my grandpa’s friend because he flirts shamelessly even though he is 55 years older than me and religiously visits his wife’s grave everyday at 4 PM. There are little things about everyone that I love.
Generally, I think that this makes me a better person. I try hard to appreciate something in everyone. The part where I always get into trouble is when I actually do fall in love with someone. I have a hard time differentiating my everyday love from my I-want-to-be-with-you-everyday love. Can you really ever just be friends with someone of the opposite sex? Is it inevitable that one will fall for the other? Is it human nature (or just Sue-nature) to fall in love with your friends?
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
I'd say its human nature or more appropriately a trait of a single person. Since it is human nature to long for companionship, we often find it in someone we are close to. If we have someone special in our lives, then we wouldnt fall in "love" with our friends.
ReplyDeleteVery well said!
ReplyDeleteI get this completely. And the poem you speak of is something I have felt somewhat as well. It's a wonderful feeling.
ReplyDelete